I've tried to hold the world for countless years
Assume its pain and take its blows
Punched, bruised, knocked face down
I spit out rocks and teeth
Mud caked and bleeding, I crawl back to you, my God
You ask much
From your servants
You ask much
I've been faithful
Pouring myself out
Until only drops remain
Isn't enough enough?
Hasn't the time arrived for healing and relief?
I wait
I wait
I wait
I wait my turn as those who've never tasted suffering skip
around me
They glance my direction, fling accusations
Then dart away
Vindicate your child, my Lord
Vindicate and heal
Pull me from the dirt into your lap
Let me rest there as you set the world in order
I cannot hold the world
Not even my own
My hands are far too small
Teach me what to hold and what to free
Help me be faithful in a world that's just too big
A world that, like a child in pain, fights back
You, oh Mighty Creator, dwarf the world you made
Your majesty envelops and overwhelms
You hold it all
Nothing will slip away
You hold me and I am secure
You encourage and teach
Comfort and restore
You see the blows, wash my wounds, and share my tears
The waiting will one day be forgotten
You will set the world in order
You will vindicate and heal
Until that day
I will always crawl back to you
-MM
-MM
10 comments:
" You hold me and I am secure
You encourage and teach
Comfort and restore
You see the blows, wash my wounds, and share my tears"
wow
Zona
Recently, the idea of God weeping with me, as Jesus wept with Mary and Martha after the death of Lazarus, has been very comforting.
This is fantastic, Martha. Really touched my heart. How great your faith is. Beautiful. <3
Thanks, Christa. It's a bit more raw than what I usually share, but it helps me to read other people's honest thoughts, so after praying about it, I decided that maybe it was my turn to be the vulnerable one.
My soul is undone by how beautifully you expressed this.
I heard Michael Card once talk about how we as believers need to learn lament. You my friend have.
Thanks, Deb. It's a little scary to lament publicly, but I do think that by sharing our thoughts and feelings we can help each other express the things that are hard to put into words. Often, when I find a song or poem that expresses how I feel, I read or listen to it over and over again.
amen
I am in tears as I read your psalm. Tears for you, for my husband who suffers from an awful autoimmune disease, for others close to me who seem to get knocked down over and over again. And tears for my own pain. Thank you for voicing such intimate thoughts.
I hope they were cathartic tears, Pam. I do find that tears can be healing. I'm sorry for the pain you and your loved ones have experienced.
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